I will admit, prayer confuses me. One of the first things I am going to ask when I get to Heaven is why some prayers work, when others do not. It is something that I have struggled over and over with since we lost Rip. I've seen prayers work, in my life and in miraculous ways in other's lives...but I always come back to "why not us".
We have our next "scary" appointment on Wednesday ( I say scary, but it is just an anatomy scan...I know I should look forward to these appointments, but they scare the bejesus out of me).These days, I pray almost constantly for Gracie. I ask other people to pray all of the time. But it can be a fight, always wondering why should this time be any different.
I keep praying, and despite everything, I feel like it is the most important thing I am doing for Gracie. Because I always come up with the same answer to all of those questions...you gotta believe.