This weekend, I went to a bridal shower for one of my very oldest friends...and as much as I wanted to be there for her, I'll admit part of me was dreading it.
I made a lot of bold declarations about the kind of person I wanted to be after Rip died, but sometimes they are hard to live up to...sometimes I feel I am nothing like the person I want to be, much less the person I used to be.
Being with people who have known me almost all of my life this weekend reaffirmed something I have learned over and over again these past five months, I could not do this without support...and there is a special kind of support that comes from the people who have known and loved you since you were a little girl (or boy).
Sometimes I feel like I have lost my light, but being with people who know stories about me from times when I was five..ten...fifteen year old...that is an irreplaceable gift. They are able to give me back some of that light, reflect it into even the darkest places.
Just as I feared, I spent most of this weekend near tears, only this time they were tears of laughter.