I should have seen it coming, those helpful, eerily accurate weekly emails changed their tune from "your baby loves your face and smell more than anything ever put on this earth" to "your baby is starting to notice others in her life". Still, the first time Gracie gave me the Heisman in order to get to Parke, it stung a little. Okay, a lot. Yep, I've got a Daddy's girl.
Don't get me wrong, I'm thrilled for him. Of all fathers, Parke Harris deserves to be adored. No worries, I didn't mind not eating turkey, cheese, drinking wine, running, practically living in bubble for ten months or being sliced open afterwards or the 3 am feedings or the...okay, so a few snarky comments, but in all seriousness, I am glad my baby loves her daddy (really, I am).
Because it dawned on me that yes, my job as her Mama is to love her unconditionally, but that does not mean I am always going to come first in her world. Part of being a mom is pushing my neediness aside. No matter what, Gracie will always come first for me but sometimes I will be second, third, or fourth (in the teenage years I may be much, much lower..but let's not go there yet).