I am terrible with change. While I am sure that losing Rip didn't help this little...we will call it a quirk, it's probably more like a character flaw...of mine, he is probably up in Heaven right now shaking his head "un uh Mama, you ain't pinning this one on me!" And it's true, I've always been this way.
And recently, there have been a lot of changes, good and bad. I left a job where I genuinely liked the people I worked with but wasn't being challenged and was spending too many hours away from my family. But it was also the job I was in when I had both of my children. I knew exactly where I was standing when this and this happened when I was pregnant with Rip and now I'm not there and it's different. Have I mentioned I don't deal well with different?
I started a new job, a job I truly think will be better for me with good people and the potential to have more flexibility. But starting a new job is stressful, until you get the hang of things you are just sitting there trying not to look or act a fool (maybe this is just me?) And these people don't know me...not the last two years me anyway...and that always makes me feel on edge. Maybe some would say that your personal life doesn't need to spill into your work life, and they are probably right. They also probably aren't the type to have a blog and blab their innermost feelings all over the world wide web. Just saying.
Just to add to the chaos, my car has been in the shop for 5 weeks. Yes, that's right, 5 weeks. Up until the new job, I really didn't need a car during the day, so we have been carpooling. I love the environment as much as the next girl, but I love my husband more and let me just say that our marriage is not cut out for a one car family. Five full weeks of driving around in a very small car with Parke, Gracie, our 100 lb chocolate lab, and the full month's collection of Parke's coffee cups have left me the teensiest bit on edge. Thank the Good Lord Jesus that my nice, clean SUV that I can take anywhere I darn well please anytime I darn well please will be home this week.
So, these among other, smaller changes have left me a tad unsettled. If by unsettled we are talking prone to emotional breakdowns and tension headaches and loved ones ducking for cover. And I haven't been writing, which I think makes things worse for me (and aforementioned loved ones). So this is my "getting back on the horse" post.
Back soon with Gracie updates (small teaser: not walking, started hitting...big fun) and various other matters of national importance.