The other night while we were out someone asked Parke if he was scared to have a little girl. He replied, "I'm just scared, period."
Hearing such a simple and honest response made me realize how true that is for us right now.
I am in turns thankful, grateful, hopeful, and excited. But underneath all of that is fear.
It feels like free-falling, and every once in a while there will be something for me to hold on to...a good doctor's appointment, the baby having a very active day, a message that seems sent just for me, an hour of truly believing everything is going to be okay...but nothing has been strong enough yet to keep me from falling again.
And it's okay, it's to be expected after all we have been through, but I am not scared of X,Y or Z...
I am just scared, period.